Driving an imaginary getaway car.

 I keep sporadically posting little posts that claim I’m coming back to blogging and then it doesn’t happen! So this time I’m not going to make any claims I’m just going to write! 

So the last week has been a rough one! Jacob came down with a serious case of croup and then an ear infection! Needless to say this momma only made it back to work a couple days after her Christmas vacation before she ended up staying home from work to play nurse! Thankfully Jacob seems to be on the mend and getting back to his old self! Which is good because we’ve got a third (how the hell did that happen) Birthday party to plan!!!! 

On the topic of time…. 2018! Wow! Wasn’t it just 2003?  This year marks my 36th birthday, the 11th year of homeownership, 15 years of working in nursing, and our 8th year of marriage. My Dad turns 73 on Friday. It’s been 3 years since Kevin was left severely injured/disabled from a car accident.  Time is a real bitch. 

My world is not what I ever expected, anticipated or dreamed it would be. I don’t mean that in a negative way. I love many aspects of my life. For example I love being a mother but I hate trying to figure out how to deal with a headstrong toddler. I never dreamed in a million years I would be the sole provider for my little family. I never imagined I’d be aflicted with PTSD so badly that somedays I contemplate taking off. I never thought I’d be facing my second ultrasound and mammogram in 6 months because “there’s something there”. All these things have taught me that while I’m damaged I’m strong as hell. Life can knock me down but I’m yet to let it knock me out! 

Today’s advice: 

Buy the damn flowers even if you can’t afford them. Soak in their beauty and when it’s time to throw them out do so unapologetically while knowing you soaked in the best they had to offer and no matter what somethings can always be replaced and the new ones will make you smile.

 Somethings are meant to be enjoyed briefly not forever, Life is one of them. 

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