All the trouble we made with smiles at the time.
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Thinking About You….
A quiet breakfast alone on what would have been Dad’s 79th Birthday. My main reflection is how thankful I am for all those mornings he sat across from me and we had breakfast together. In the last two years those breakfasts were always his best moments of the day. Our breakfast conversations always had moments and meaning I will treasure forever. Even tho those two years were the absolute hardest of both of our lives I’m so thankful he was here at home with us. I’m so thankful for all those quiet breakfasts together. Happy heavenly Birthday Dad!
Another year gone….
People are going to judge you no matter what you do… So here is the only advice I have for 2024!!! Do what you want. Love who you love. Love yourself…love your life. Take the risks. The perfect cookie cutter life doesn’t exist so if something takes your breath away do it. If it feels like magic grab it.. even if you only catch it once. Live your damn life on your terms. Chase sunsets and wake up to greet the next sunrise. ❤️
Probably gives you butterflies….
It’s a good thing that the things I think about in my head aren’t written on my face.
My Brain Goes “ahhhhh”… Can’t Hear My Thoughts!!!
I’ve said it before but it bears repeating…Let go of self imposed expectations that only serve to steal your own joy and peacefulness!
Somewhere in my memory…
Deep breath friends…. The finish line is right there!! Many of you know that Christmas is my absolute favourite but this is my first Christmas without either of my parents and I’m not going to lie to you…. I’ve been feeling all the feelings. I’ve definitely found moments of joy and festive fun but I’ve also felt sadness and emptiness. I’ve found myself finding nostalgia in all the things and embracing the whole season as best I can. Here’s your reminder that joy and grief can absolutely coexist. It’s ok to be sad and it’s ok to enjoy the season… im over here doing both simultaneously and im ok ❤️
Hello December…
It makes me think of you. It makes me think of those days in that little farmhouse. That roaring warm fire in that old wood stove. Those cheery yellow curtains that hid the sadness. The smell of a fresh cut Christmas tree mixed with brewed coffee and cigarette smoke. Those red Christmas balls. The way you made sure to make it magic no matter what was going on in real life.
Things I’ll remember for the rest of my life. I close my eyes and they are there, you’re there. We’re all there. In that house. Time forever frozen in my mind.
Everything Happens For A Reason…
I’m a firm believer in the old saying “Everything happens for a reason.” A handful of years ago I found myself drawn to all things vintage Christmas and became very nostalgic for things that were part of my childhood Christmases. Of course given that I’m 41 a lot of those trinkets are no longer around. Tho certain things vividly stand out in my memory. The tinsil garlands that used to hang on our living room ceiling, the plastic holly candle ring that sat on the coffee table and my mothers purple mercury glass beaded cross. I remember her always putting it on the tree herself and it always had to go on last. This ornament brought her joy. Unfortunately when I was about 8/9 I remember it coming apart and being tucked away but never repaired. Since she died I found myself searching online for a beaded cross. This past week I stumbled on a lady selling a huge lot of vintage ornaments. I figured it couldn’t hurt to ask if I could purchase just the one. I told her my story and she agreed to sell it to me. I received it today with the sweetest note from the seller. While this isn’t my Mom’s exact ornament having this little piece brings me comfort. It’s a tangible reminder of Christmases past and it reminds me of her ❤️
It Made Me Think Of You….
Isn’t it crazy how fast time passes? 10 years comes and goes in the blink of an eye. A lifetime really isn’t that long. Don’t waste your days sitting around wondering about the meaning of life!
3 am is the perfect time to sit in the darkness with all this sadness. Dust yourself off at dawn and try to find something good in today.
Find a reason to smile. Find a reason to celebrate. Pretty soon we will deck the halls again. Another whole year come and gone.
Another whole year without you.
You won’t remember all the good times. You won’t remember all the problems. Some days you will feel alive. Some days you will feel defeat.
Patch up your tattered edges. Hold the line because it’s about to get colder and colder as the darkness of winter approaches. Months of waiting and wading through the frost.
The sun will shine and the flowers will show their faces again…. For those of us who make it through the season of darkness.
🍁💔
I hope you never lose your sense of wonder….
And when you get the chance to sit it out or dance….I hope you dance.
There aren’t any words to adequately describe this trip. Those 8 days will never be forgotten. It was a week of making memories and feeling all the feels.
My Mom would of absolutely loved Disneyland.
What an adventure and a gift to have gotten to experience this with my little family.
Life With The McGavins 